Wednesday, October 17, 2012

I know I can beat Al Roker

Lots of people have goals for races. They want negative splits, a certain per minute mile, not pooping themselves and on and on. My number one goal for every race has always been to get to the finish line without saying, "I am never doing this again". I'm not gunning for the win. I just want to have a little fun and challenge myself. Another ongoing goal is to beat the sweeper van.

So I thought that it would be fun for this race to pick another goal.

Everyone knows about Oprah and Ditty. And it was a humbling experience to know that they're marathon times are out of my league. Good job for them blah blah blah. So who is in my league?
Al Roker - 7:09 - I know I can beat this. Even when the road turned to lava and the runners started      to look like extras from the Thriller Video at Chicago 2010, I beat this.
David Lee Roth - 6:04 - I can beat this. And I also find it hilarious that I found his name in an Internet search of celebrity marathon times. It also showed up with this picture.
The thought of this picture and this man running a marathon will hopefully carry me through at least 6-7 miles... laughing.
Meredith Viera - 5:59 - She's a TV personality, she's charming, witty... and I'm gonna beat her too!
Katie Holmes - 5:29 - Insert Scientology joke here... I remember when she ran this time and some uppity so and so wrote into Runner's World saying things like how she wasn't even running and people as slow as her should be flogged and kicked and all races should only allow people that can run under 4 hour marathons and all us 5+ hour marathon people are just taking up everyone else's oxygen. And I hate that guy. Good job Katie! I'm still gonna beat you! ( I hope so).
And now we come to my real nemesis.... Jared Fogle - 5:13 - The Subway guy. He got famous for loosing weight eating Subway Sandwiches. And now he travels around with his "I used to be a big fella" pants encouraging people to eat sandwiches or something. I want to beat that guy.
We'll see.


  1. ahhh young david lee roth, how i miss your red spandex and fuzzy chest hair! you are totally gonna kick his time's ass! (that sounded a little weird when i wrote it...but you know what i mean! :)

    i heart you and hope you have a lot of fun...i will be pulling for you to beat katie and jared's time too!

    "might as well jump, *jump*....ahhhh go ahead and jump, *jump*..."


  2. But . . . can you run a 5:29 without a sports bra, like Katie did?

    You'll do AWESOME. And totally beat the sandwich guy.

    1. she ran it without a sports bra? why do you know that?